one minute movie reviews

Library flood update

Mon, 22 Sep 2008 15:30:49 GMT

Back in June, I promised to let people know about after-the-flood. Everything on the first floor of the library was destroyed, either by the five feet of water or the toxic conditions of the flood. This included the entire adult collection, some 150,000 items. We're starting over at a mall on the other side of town with the things which were checked out at the time of the flood, about 30,000 items. The downtown building has been gutted and is currently sealed, awaiting its turn in the queue of city buildings which were damaged. FEMA does not supply funds for interim expenses as libraries are not considered vital facilities.

If you're interested, more information can be found here:

http://www.crlibrary.org/flood/index.html

:(

Fri, 13 Jun 2008 02:59:38 GMT

Not going to work today

Thu, 12 Jun 2008 18:30:10 GMT

What I did on Tues. night

Thu, 29 May 2008 22:12:27 GMT

No Country For Old Men

Thu, 31 Jan 2008 16:42:46 GMT

I really enjoyed the earlier parts of the movie, as in just LOVED them
to pieces--wonderful actors, wonderful dialogue, wonderful filmmaking.
Whatever I think of the movie as a whole, I still love scenes from it.
But that's about it. I'm puzzled by the acclaim this movie is receiving
almost unanimously because I don't agree at all. However, that could
be due to my personal tastes--I'm not a Cormac McCarthy fan.

The major specific problems I had have to do with the Tommy Lee Jones
character and the Josh Brolin character:

I mostly love Tommy Lee Jones no matter what he's doing--he's always
worth watching and almost always emotionally engaging. During the
scenes when he was working the case, I was charmed by his love for
his job and the obvious pleasure he took in instructing his deputy,
cadging horses from his wife, bantering with coworkers, etc. So I
found it very confusing later on when apparently a major theme of
the movie was his decision to retire because of his distaste for the
way the world was changing and his feelings of being overwhelmed by
the insanity of the criminals. Which, a) I disagree with--surely
in his long career he'd become familiar with the unpleasantness and
irrationality of the serial killer mentality, and b) Fine! Retire!
You must be seventy years old, at least! What's the big deal?, and
c) all of a sudden his character takes a U-turn from chipper,
competent, wisecracking old sheriff to OMG I HAVE SUCH ANGST LET ME
TELL YOU MY DREAMS ABOUT MY FATHER guy. Both characters are fine but
I really couldn't reconcile them.

Okay, Josh Brolin: His character was fine, hung together all the way
through, but what was with the movie's POV? Whereas I got whiplash
from Tommy Lee Jones's character changing into a different person
toward the end, I got whiplash from Josh Brolin abruptly changing
from the protagonist to just another dead body on the floor, having
been killed off camera, and now we'll move right along. I tried to
hang on for the ride but that's where the movie really lost me. They
didn't have to catch and punish the killer if they didn't want to,
they didn't have to have a happy ending where Josh Brolin's wife
unexpectedly takes out the killer and finds the money, they didn't
even have to finish up the scene with Tommy Lee Jones telling us
about his dreams if they didn't want to. But for heaven's sake, I
was interested in Josh Brolin's character and they're the ones who
kept showing his cat-and-mouse pursuit throughout the first three-
fourths of the movie. Pfft. That angered me. Poor moviemaking.

Anyway, that's what I thought. The reviews I'm reading are making me
crazy saying things like "better than Fargo" and "not since The
Big Lebowski" and NO WAY.

Image which I think might be by lunulet but am not sure

Wed, 30 Jan 2008 04:47:56 GMT

If anyone knows for sure, that would be very helpful.

Fun with Harry Potter

Mon, 28 Jan 2008 04:42:57 GMT

I called dibs on Harry Potter here as soon as our library was finished with its DH promotion this summer, and he's been good entertainment ever since. For a while it was fun to set him up outside the closed door of a room where somebody was taking a nap to startle them when they came out, or to have him peeking out the front window of our house, and he was always fun at parties. Now he's become a family wedding tradition. We attached a picture of the happy couple to his hand and put "Congratulations Jill and Shane" in Harry Potter font down around his release date parts and voila!

DH spoiler here

Sat, 21 Jul 2007 19:09:50 GMT

DH includes many allusions to the first book. Here's an easy-to-miss one that I haven't seen mentioned yet.

In PS/SS Draco's outstretched hand to Harry is left hanging in his abortive handshake attempt; and in DH, Draco's outstretched hand in the room of hidden objects, which Harry then grasps.

My Deathly Hallows predictions

Sat, 07 Jul 2007 13:06:51 GMT

1. If we revisit the Dursleys at all, I think it will have something to do with Petunia and her "correspondence" with Dumbledore. She has seemed to know more than she lets on. Maybe she has a horcrux hidden in the refrigerator or something.

2. The artwork for the deluxe edition is sort of a spoiler, showing Harry, Ron and Hermione riding a dragon. This may be their method of transport on the quest for Horcruxes. One way or another, it appears that book 7 will be a change of pace, not primarily set at Hogwarts. I hope that the Horcrux hunt doesn't turn into a sort of Goblet of Fire thing with task after task. Maybe Regulus Black will have done some more prep work for Harry to shorten the process.

3. Harry, Ron and Hermione will all survive and prevail. None of them will turn to the Dark Side. I have seen no sign of questionable loyalty in the earlier books and I don't believe Rowling will kill off members of the Trio. It doesn't seem to be that sort of series. Also, Voldemort has been the loser almost all of the time when it comes down to a one-on-one with Harry, which is foreordained for the final chapter (by the stupid prophecy). Voldemort's going down. He should have worked on better planning skills.

4. Harry will remain clueless about Snape's allegiance for as much of the book as possible, so that we will all be astounded at the revelation of Snape's true heroism. I'm very afraid Snape is doomed to die. It will be easier for the other characters to deal with him afterwards if they're thinking of him in the abstract, rather than having him around being just as unpleasant and greasy-haired as ever while having to be grateful to him. Nobody will mourn for him except me.

5. Although I have no doubts about which side Snape plays for, Draco Malfoy is a wild card now. I predict that he'll have a key moment someplace in the book, and that it will be a surprise advantage for the Good Guys, but no idea what his reaction to the killing of Dumbledore will turn out to be. Yay for ambivalence and unpredictability! Yay for Draco's growth into a multi-dimensional character! Bring it home, baby.

6. I will be displeased if that wizard's debt thing that Peter Pettigrew owes to Harry for sparing his life in PoA never comes to anything. Since contracting that debt, Pettigrew has helped Voldemort get a new body by taking Harry's blood, and I don't think that counts for a good payback to Harry. So I'll be looking for some help for Harry from that direction, too.

7. Harry and Ginny will get together again after his absurd plot-driven breakup with her at the end of HBP. She's been his manifest destiny since Book 1 and her character's wrongheaded retooling in the past few books has obviously been grooming her to be the consort of the Chosen One. Ugh. Also, Ron and Hermione will become officially a couple although they've virtually been locked in a joyless marriage for years. Cho will be like that girl in Sk8er Boi, married to some no-name and reading about Harry-and-Ginny in the society news. Cho's friend Marietta will live her entire life with the word SNEAK spelled out in zits on her face, thanks to Hermione.

8. Lupin will survive and he and Tonks will get married. Maybe Mr. Weasley will pass some laws or pull some strings so they can procreate.

9. Hagrid will die a hero's death. And there will be much rejoicing. (That one isn't a real prediction, just a wish my heart makes.)

10. The timing of the final Harry Potter book comes at a peculiar time for me personally. My youngest child, who grew up in real time along with Harry, is preparing to leave home and go to college. My older children are all going through pivotal life changes this summer, too. These circumstances add a certain resonance to my feelings about the end of the series. As all the children, real and fictional, finish up their childhoods and set off to discover what the future holds for them, I wish them well with all my heart.

This was fun. Do it if you'd like to.

Thu, 28 Jun 2007 03:28:54 GMT

1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the next 4-7 sentences on your LJ along with these instructions.
5. Don't you dare dig for that "cool" or "intellectual" book in your closet! I know you were thinking about it! Just pick up whatever is closest (unless it's too troublesome to reach and is really heavy. Then go back to step 1).
6. Tag five people.

"There's an endless supply of first-time free-lancers who are so happy to see their names in print that they don't care if they ever get paid. But you can't fill a magazine with the work of eager volunteers." -letter from David Owen to Tom Philips, August 26, 1988

Oh, can't we now?

from Spy: The Funny Years, by Kurt Anderson, Graydon Carter, George Kalogerakis. (excellent, but check out from the library rather than buy--$40)

Unconventional Love Stories: A Pop Quiz

Mon, 05 Feb 2007 20:38:55 GMT

1. A boy and his rose: reading this is the sweetest Valentine you can give yourself

2. A teenager and his sentient, murderous, self-regenerating car: a cautionary tale for people who name their vehicles

3. An author and his creations: author annihilates the fourth wall, enters his own book, and interacts with his alter ego--postmodernism at its most intriguing

4. A boy and his little brother: even though your book is sometimes pretentious and irritating, your heart's in the right place and your story is heartwarming

5. A girl, a priest, and The Church: the eternal triangle, plus afascinating look at life in the Australian outback

6. An ardent young girl and a cruel traitorous world: she puts us all
to shame

7. A man and a figment of his imagination: green light at the end of the pier, you know--although it's been relegated to cliche status by years of overanalysis, still a great read with great characters and a great
story. (Note the absence of overanalysis here)

8. A woman and her profession: a Norman Rockwell-style Valentine to teachers and small town America

9. A man and his house: My house is me and I am it. My house is where I like to be and it looks like all my dreams.

10. A boy and his athletic, studly, super-nice roommate: award winner for Most Cleverly Disguised Gay Love Story Regularly Assigned in High School English Classes From the Sixties Up to the Present Day

a. A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius by Dave Eggers

b. Diary of a Young Girl by Anne Frank

c. A Separate Peace by John Knowles

d. The Big Orange Splot by D. Manus Pinkwater

e. The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupery

f. The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald

g. Good Morning, Miss Dove by Frances Gray Patton

h. Breakfast of Champions by Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.

i. Christine by Stephen King

j. The Thorn Birds by Colleen McCullough

Read some Dickens, it's good!

Thu, 14 Dec 2006 18:12:30 GMT

It is impossible to live in our society and be unfamiliar with the story of Dickens' A Christmas Carol. Scrooge has been played by Reginald Owen, Alastair Sim, George C. Scott, Patrick Stewart, Mr. Magoo, and Bill Murray, among countless others. It is an unwritten rule that every television show ever made must have a "Christmas Carol" episode. I have fond memories of my brother playing Marley's Ghost in a junior high production, shrieking, "MANKIND WAS MY BUSINESS!" and rattling his chains and generally chewing up the scenery. The story of The Christmas Carol is more often portrayed than that of the Nativity. Yet many people have never read the original version, Dickens' 1843 classic, written to pay off a debt and arguably the source of today's family-oriented Christmas tradition in the Western world.

Aside from being a huge historical icon, A Christmas Carol is a wonderfully enjoyable read. Scrooge is a peerless protagonist, the epitome of callousness and stinginess at the beginning of the tale ("Oh! But he was a tight-fisted hand at the grindstone, Scrooge! a squeezing, wrenching, grasping, scraping, clutching, covetous, old sinner!") who still retains the remnants of a sense of humor ("There's more of gravy than of grave about you, whatever you are!"), suffers through his ghostly visitations in a surprisingly receptive way and obligingly is redeemed ("I don't know what to do!...I am as light as a feather, I am as happy as an angel, I am as merry as a schoolboy. I am as giddy as a drunken man. A merry Christmas to everybody! A happy New Year to all the world! Hallo here! Whoop! Hallo!") to spend the rest of his life celebrating Christmas every minute in the most philanthropic of ways. It is a partially sad ending for those readers who preferred him crabby and misanthropic.

Aside from Scrooge, the story is filled with vivid characters who have all become Christmastime icons: Bob Cratchit, patron saint of all overworked, underpaid employees, who yet gets a paid holiday on Christmas even before Scrooge's reformation; Scrooge's benevolent nephew, who speaks one of the most oft-quoted peons to the Christmas season ("There are many things from which I might have derived good, by which I have not profited, I dare say,... Christmas among the rest. But I am sure I have always thought of Christmas time, when it has come round -- apart from the veneration due to its sacred name and origin, if anything belonging to it can be apart from that -- as a good time: a kind, forgiving, charitable, pleasant time: the only time I know of, in the long calendar of the year, when men and women seem by one consent to open their shut-up hearts freely, and to think of people below them as if they really were fellow-passengers to the grave, and not another race of creatures bound on other journeys. And therefore, uncle, though it has never put a scrap of gold or silver in my pocket, I believe that it has done me good, and will do me good; and I say, God bless it!"); the Ghost of Christmas Yet To Come, who might be even scarier than Marley's Ghost (is it more scary to have a deceased friend threaten you with a horrific afterlife, or to have a faceless, silent specter point out your tombstone to you? Discuss among yourselves); and, of course, Tiny Tim ("God Bless Us, Every One!").

It is easy to become jaded and cynical about the Christmas season in the (materialistic, hypocritical, troubled) world of today. Reading this Victorian classic is an easy way to receive an infusion of Christmas spirit direct from 1843.

These are the scariest stories I know

Fri, 27 Oct 2006 15:42:55 GMT

The Girl in a Swing by Richard Adams--If you've read Watership Down, you might expect this novel
about a slightly psychic but otherwise commonplace young man who falls in love with a mysterious
woman to be, well, benign? NO. This is a reading experience of ever-mounting, unrelieved tension,
and suspense, and terror, which will haunt you for a long time after you read it.

Ghost Story by Peter Straub--This story of four young men grown old, tied together inexorably by
a tragedy and haunted by regrets and other things, is filled with eerie moments. As always, I enjoy
the spooky buildup to the gory denouement, but the spooky here is very well done. This book was
made into a movie which is also very good.

The Thief of Always by Clive Barker--Harvey Swick is a very bored young man until he meets a helpful
guy named Rictus, who whisks him away to Holiday House. There it is spring in the morning, summer in
the afternoon, Halloween in the evening and Christmas before bedtime, every day. Barker is a master
in the field of horror, usually writing for adults, but I think this understated book for all ages is his most
effective.

The Sneetches and other stories by Dr. Seuss--This innocuous-sounding children's book contains a story titled
"What Was I Scared Of?" featuring one of the most terrifying literary creations ever: the pale green pants
with nobody inside 'em. I was frightened of this book as a child, and my children after me. If you are not
yet familiar with it, beware. I'm not joking here. SCARY.

We Have Always Lived in the Castle by Shirley Jackson--a surprisingly little-known classic by the author
of The Lottery and The Haunting of Hill House. The story is narrated in a matter-of-fact voice by the
younger sister in a family which had earlier been partially wiped out by a notorious poisoning incident.
The remnants of the family live isolated and shunned by the residents of the neighboring village, and
as they attempt to carry on their everyday lives, we slowly become aware of the reticence between
the surviving members. As always, the understated is far scarier than the elaborately described monster.

Pet Sematary by Stephen King--Okay, can't do this without having Stephen King. Pet Sematary is not
by any means my favorite King book, but that is partly because it's just too scary for me. The zombiefied
creatures are scary, yes, but even more frightening is the depiction of just how far around the bend
grief can send a person, and what horrible acts it can inspire a usually rational sane person to do in
their desperation.

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

Sun, 17 Jul 2005 14:45:45 GMT

Tim Burton's Charlie and the Chocolate Factory will be most successful with members of the audience who have not known and loved the 1971 version starring Gene Wilder for most of their lives. Burton offers a winningly grotesque adaptation of Roald Dahl's book, filled with visual oomph and dark humor, but he's fighting a losing battle with people who can't help remembering the wacky genius of the earlier movie and the far superior vocal numbers of the 1971 Oompa Loompas. Johnny Depp is often funny but his characterization is uncomfortably reminiscent of Michael Jackson, and the most successful parts of the movie are those outside the chocolate factory, featuring Charlie's family and Willie Wonka's childhood. I enjoyed watching Charlie and the Chocolate Factory but didn't find it exceptional, and I gave it eight out of ten.

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Tue, 13 Apr 2004 15:03:25 GMT

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind stars Jim Carrey and Kate Winslet and another genius script from Charlie Kaufman, brilliantly directed by Michel Gondry. The plot involves Carrey and Winslet breaking off their relationship and utilizing the services of a surrealistic agency which erases all memories of the former loved one from the client's brain; but describing the plot of this movie misses the point. Mentioning the superb performances, the striking visual impact, the excellence of the minor characters, and the perfection of the smallest details, also kind of misses the point. To me, the point is how Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind tells its story and makes its points in such a wildly original way. Originality in today's world can't be celebrated enough. I gave it ten out of ten.

The Butterfly Effect

Tue, 13 Apr 2004 14:38:08 GMT

The Butterfly Effect features Ashton Kutcher as a young man who discovers that he can mentally travel back to certain events in his life and alter his behavior, thus changing his present-day circumstances. The first part of the movie is heavy going as it's all just about his grim, horrible life as it originally happened, and some of it is quite disturbing. Once he starts tampering with events, the ride becomes more exciting. If you can ignore how silly the premise is, The Butterfly Effect is an intriguing sci-fi drama done with an unusual respect for continuity and some wonderful off-beat details. The disturbing parts include a child molestation subplot, the threat of a prison rape, and cold-blooded murder of a pet, so be aware that it's not a lighthearted romp. I gave it eight out of ten.

Calendar Girls

Fri, 27 Feb 2004 13:45:54 GMT

Calendar Girls is a 2003 movie from the U.K. based on the real-life story of the middle-aged members of a Yorkshire Women's Institute who published a calendar featuring nude pictures of themselves to benefit a local hospital. Helen Mirren and Julie Walters are both funny and touching as the main instigators of the plan, but all of the ladies are very cute and Calendar Girls does an even better job than Something's Gotta Give of celebrating the beauty of the middle-aged woman. Although Calendar Girls falters when it ventures into heavy drama, it's successful as a pleasant comedy and a showcase for a number of terrific actresses. I gave it eight out of ten.

50 First Dates

Fri, 27 Feb 2004 13:37:25 GMT

50 First Dates features Adam Sandler and Drew Barrymore, trying to recapture the romantic cuteness of The Wedding Singer. This time out Sandler plays a marine veterinarian in Hawaii who specializes in one night stands with tourists, and Barrymore plays a woman with short-term memory loss, like the guy in Memento. Every day she wakes up thinking it's the day of the car crash which caused her brain damage. This condition makes a continuing relationship with Sandler difficult but he keeps trying, because he was cured of the one-night-stand thing as soon as he saw her. 50 First Dates is very sweet at times and often funny as well, but it suffers from frequent outbursts of incongruous gross-out humor and dirty jokes. I gave it six out of ten.

Catch That Kid

Tue, 10 Feb 2004 02:44:58 GMT

Catch That Kid is a truly horrible children's movie about three eighth graders robbing a bank because the little girl's father suddenly falls down and needs an experimental operation in Denmark which will cost $250,000. Both boys have a crush on the girl and she strings them along to get them to help her in a way that is supposed to be cute but comes off as calculating and horrifyingly inappropriate. Meanwhile, every minute contains nonsensical plot points, witless dialogue and offensive situations. Lastly, the bank the kids rob resembles a futuristic spaceship full of holograms and the safe is conveniently located at the top of a 100-foot-high room. Catch That Kid should be destroyed and never spoken of again. I gave it two out of ten.

Miracle

Mon, 09 Feb 2004 13:57:59 GMT

Miracle tells the story of the U.S. ice hockey team who won the 1980 Olympic gold medal in a huge upset. Kurt Russell, wearing the ugliest possible haircut and a stunning array of plaid pants, plays Herb Brooks, the dour Minnesota coach who hand-picked the team and bullied and coerced them to victory. Hockey fans will like all the training and game footage, and the young hockey players are very pretty, but the story is fairly straightforward. Herb picks the team, they get over some initial rivalries, work hard, and go to the Olympics at Lake Placid, end of story. Miracle is pleasant but not so inspiring or thought-provoking as it seems meant to be. I gave it seven out of ten.

Luther

Tue, 03 Feb 2004 01:47:01 GMT

Luther is an account of the start of the Protestant Reformation starring Joseph Fiennes as Martin Luther. It's a muddled history lesson which does fairly well explaining Luther's objections to indulgences and holy relics but gets problematic with all the complicated politics between the Catholic Church, the German emperor, and a bunch of others I didn't catch. I was somewhat distracted by the funny outfits, especially the emperor's. Fiennes plays Luther in a variety of ways and it's hard to get a handle on him, particularly when he's raving at some unseen devil like a lunatic. I found Luther mostly unsuccessful and gave it four out of ten.

The Perfect Score

Mon, 02 Feb 2004 19:39:39 GMT

The Perfect Score is about a group of high school students who, for various reasons, need to score higher on the SAT than they are able to and who concoct a scheme to steal the answers. Predictably, the ragtag bunch of teenagers bond together, have some adventures, and learn some valuable lessons. The heist portions of the movie aren't convincing and the script is not smart enough for a movie about the SAT, but the kids are likable enough and there are some unexpectedly good lines sprinkled here and there. The Perfect Score is not a bad movie for and about teenagers. I gave it seven out of ten.

Win a Date with Tad Hamilton

Mon, 26 Jan 2004 14:13:05 GMT

The plot goes thusly: the eponymous Hamilton is a bad-boy movie star who runs a contest to repair his image and subsequently goes on a dream date with a grocery store clerk from Frazier's Bottom, West Virginia. Frazier's Bottom, ha ha. The odd-couple setup is rendered pointless by the fact that the small-town girl is every bit as beautiful, perfectly groomed, and vacuous as the movie star. Topher Grace as the grocery store manager and Gary Cole as the girl's father (who hilariously goes Hollywood) seem to have wandered over from a sharper, funnier movie. Win a Date with Tad Hamilton is mostly as bland as its two main characters. I gave it six out of ten.

Teacher's Pet

Sat, 17 Jan 2004 22:14:30 GMT

Teacher's Pet is a 74-minute cartoon adapted from a show on the Disney Channel. Nathan Lane voices the part of a freakishly intelligent dog who routinely disguises himself as a boy and attends school along with his master. The movie covers an eventful summer break during which the dog tracks down a mad scientist (played by Kelsey Grammer) who obligingly transforms him into a man. I haven't seen the TV series but I'll be looking for it. The movie is an exhilarating, surrealistic, somewhat warped musical comedy of errors full of sly gags. Children should enjoy the fast pace and funny animals but adults will appreciate the artistry of Teacher's Pet on a completely different level. I loved every minute of it and gave it ten out of ten.

Chasing Liberty

Tue, 13 Jan 2004 01:14:08 GMT

Chasing Liberty is a fluffy and implausible story about Mandy Moore being the president's daughter and how she's really sick of all the Secret Service crowding her so she ditches them while on a visit to Europe. She picks up a cute guy who is actually another Secret Service agent and makes him uncomfortable by sexually harassing him and involving herself in life-threatening situations, but he falls in love with her anyway because the script says he must. Moore plays her part with all the charm of a cat in heat and there are some troubling ethical problems with the plotline. Chasing Liberty is distasteful and I gave it three out of ten.